Since becoming a parent, I read a lot of articles on parenting. Especially while pregnant. With my first pregnancy, I would read an article then call my mom freaking out. She'd lovingly tell me to stop reading. In most articles, you hear the experts say, do this, don't do that, eat this, stay away from that, stop this, start doing that...ect, ect, ect. It's crazy to me see experts on both sides of an issue and how they are both right and both wrong. When I first had Sam I had my mind made up on how I wanted to parent him. (He had other ideas!) I quickly learned that the experts weren't all that helpful. I wanted a regular birth, to breastfeed only, no co-sleeping, no bottle to bed, correct baby talk, no fast food, no yelling kind of mom. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Guess what....I'm not that mom. I am not any kind of mom, and all of them all in one! I had to have a c-section, was put on bed rest AFTER having Sam, so he had to co-sleep with me because I couldn't get up and lift him onto the bed. For mental reasons, it was so healing for him to be with me in the bed too. He had acid reflux and only held down a certain formula so the girls were put away. I co-slept with Vanessa to keep her alive! I breast and bottle fed her for a while because it wasn't always convenient to pop one of the girls out. And then we found she wouldn't choke if she was sitting straight up, so we switched completely to the bottle. And then she slept sitting straight up in her carseat. (Right next to the bed of course) We don't talk baby talk to the kids, but also don't correct them. They'll learn how to talk, by listening to us. (I already miss the way Sam would miss pronounce some words.) After I had Sam, I was tired....11 months later, I was even more tired when Vanessa was born. Dinner doesn't always get made...so chicken nuggets and fries it is! My kids co-sleep, sleep alone, self feed when they have 2 teeth and after they have tried different foods to make sure there aren't any allergies, they have free play, structure play, play dates, they have one on one time, and alone time, they went down with bottles to help them sleep train, they have regular meals, they have days where they snack all day....my kids are happy and healthy and (for the most part) very well behaved. The biggest thing I have learned in the (almost) 3 short years that I've been a mom is that I'm the expert for my family! What I do may or may not work for another family (or on all my own kids!). I've stuck to my guns on some issues and totally have eaten my words on others! I'm sure that my parenting advise would cause some to worry, question and roll their eyes.
There isn't a manual to parenting and why are we trying to make one. No two kids are alike....mine are proof of that!!! But more importantly, why are are knocking each other down because of things we do and don't do with our kids?! I constantly turn to my best friend for ideas and advice and vice- a-versa! It takes a village people!!! If they have the basic needs, are taught to be polite and respectful, and are loved then guess what mom...YOU'RE DOING A GREAT JOB!!! KEEP IT UP!!!
Hanselmann Wedding {Nauvoo style}
10 years ago
